she's a junior now, part 2

As a follow up to yesterday's post about teen clothing, I have a few more rants and raves observations.

Sometimes I wonder why they think every girl is on the cheer leading squad. I've seen so many cheer shirts. Do the math... a very small percentage of girls make the squad. Do all those other girls want to wear cheer shirts? Really?

And then if they don't say something about cheer on them, they have a rock band looking graphic on them. The other day I saw this shirt and I was thinking 'oh this one is kinda cute, it's got pink on it' and then I stopped and thought 'wait a minute...those are skulls!'. Yes, pink skulls! Um...ick, people!

And I don't want her shirt to say something crude either. Too hot to handle. Kiss this! I'm not listening. I'm a diva. Whatever. It's all about me. No wonder kids think they run the world and it should revolve around them. Head's up, girlfriend, it doesn't!

And then there is the thing with the low rider jeans. I would like there to be less space from the top of the pants to her belly button than what is currently available. We try on clothes and I wonder how they're gonna stay on. They don't even hit anywhere natural or normal. I'm not a prude... at least I don't think I'm a prude! I love my jeans and capris that hit below the belly button. But a tad below the belly button. A tad is not inches!

I must say that I have seen some cute stuff. But you do have to hunt for it. Those slender tshirts can be cute. And since my daughter is the size of a twig, they actually fit her without being overly tight...sometimes. I have no idea what moms do for shirts if their daughter has a little meat on her bones. The shirts often look like they're spray painted on. ugh.

Hello... Lands End??

she's a junior now

I feel like I need lessons in dressing my kid! I used to feel like I had things down. Cute top and a pair of pants or shorts. Got it! Easy Peezy.

Enter the juniors department.

She's been begging me to take her to some of 'those' stores. You know the ones. Those flashy, noisy, very mall-like, super trendy stores. *sigh* So yesterday I did what any reasonable mom would do and pre-scoped them out without her. She's been begging for tank tops for summer, so I bought her some tanks at Penneys and Justice and came home, hoping for the best. Well....

So today I took back the clothes that didn't fit. By the way, Limited Too just because Justice. And their clothes are adorable and she can still wear their biggest size...even though their prices are high (to me). But their tank tops show her bra. What is up with that?

Everywhere I go lately, I keep asking myself the same questions as I look at the clothes....

How exactly do you wear that?
Do you have to wear a top under it?
Why do you have to wear a top under everything?
Why is this top so low cut?
Just exactly what is that?

I think I'm a reasonably level headed person and in the past, I've had no problems with the shirt and bottoms routine. But now? *sigh*

help.

seek first

Right when I woke up this morning, my mind started racing. What if.....? What about....? And then what.....? It went on and on. And this was before I was fully awake!

But then God spoke this to me....





...reminding me of what He wants my focus to be on today...not just 'first thing', but ALL DAY! I know He knows about what's going on around me and aware of what feels like monumental circumstances right now. Even still....seek first!

things

There are some things going on this week. Hard things. Complicated things. Exasperating things. Tiring things. Frustrating things. Things that make me want to wave the white flag and give up. But things I can't really chit chat about here. So forgive me if I'm not my usual self...whoever that is... but life just feels real hard now.

If you need me, I'll either be a basketcase or on my knees... or both! : )

always four

And then there was today. I talked to a friend at church that I've known since before Bub got sick. She was remembering that these are special days for us. Strangely we were chatting as some little kids were scurrying by. Including a little boy or two. I just kinda smiled at her and out of nowhere said he's always four to me.

And that's so true. And at the same time, so odd.

He never ages in my mind. Oh I can do the math and figure out how old he would be... a tween right now. But in my mind's eye, he's always four. Sometimes I see little boys that have a particular quality of Bub. That happened at Disney at a bus stop and the first night at the fireworks. And it's happened other times too. And it pricks my heart. Sometimes it brings a smile. Other times tears.

But no matter what, he's always four.

---------------------------

On a side note, today was a good day. Boo was gone all day at a church function. We chatted about Bub a little bit, but that was all. I thought about asking if he wanted to go to the cemetery, but it's chilly and very windy and I hate going when it's like that. So we just spent the day quietly at home. And that's ok.

a beanie story

When Boo was a toddler, she got her first Beanie Baby. And then she got a few more. Before long we had a whole bundle of them. But of course, a few favorites floated to the top of the heap. And they were the 'go to' buddies when she needed a cuddle. She also carried at least one Beanie under her armpit while at home for about three years. Anyhoo...

She got these two beanies. Kitties, of course. One's name was Amber. And the other one was Pounce. These were their given names on the tags, and she decided those were their names. So things went merrily along with Amber and Pounce. Until one day...

Pounce came up missing! We tore the house up. But she was gone. Boo was coping pretty well with it, even though it was a fave. I thought we had skated by on the whole Pounce thing. And then one day I went in her room and she had Amber and she was pointing Amber's little kitty paw at it's chest and telling me that Amber misses Pounce in her heart.

Well that did it. I just couldn't take it anymore. She was crushed that her buddy was gone. And I felt a little sorry for her. So I called an antique store around the corner from me and asked them if they had a Pounce. They did! I told the hubby to pick it up on the way home. So we replaced Pounce and I don't think she ever realized it was a new Pounce. Until one day...

We were in her room playing and I was sitting on the floor and I was sort of leaning back and had my hands stretched out behind me and I felt something. My fingers couldn't believe it. I had found Pounce! The first one! The real one! So then I had a problem. What to do with one of these Beanies.

I talked to her about it, and she offered to give the new Pounce to Bub. At the time he didn't have very many Beanies since he struggled with asthma some earlier in his life. He couldn't have a lot of fuzzies. So it was decided. We gave Pounce to Bub. He was thrilled. And quickly named him/her Kitty. (clever, I know!) Not long after that, he got another Beanie and he named that one Meow Meow (clever, I know!).

Even though he had many many Beanies in his life, Kitty and Meow Meow were his constant buddies through everything. Every nap, his third birthday. The church nursery. And then he got sick. And they were there for every test, every poke, surgeries, radiation, clinic visits...you name it and I've got a picture of him with them tucked under his arm pit or sitting loyally beside him.

And they were his buddies to the end. After we lost him, we went into his room and gathered up his Beanies. Kitty and Meow Meow were on his chest. Now they reside in the china cabinet.

Meow Meow on the left.

and Kitty on the right.

Notice the bandaid on Meow Meow's little wrist. That was put on by a sweet clinic nurse.

seven

A lot of things have been going on this week.

And along side that has been the knowing that an anniversary is coming up. On Sunday. An unhappy one. One that says our boy has been gone for seven years. Not six years like last year. Seven.

Last year when I had just started to blog and didn't have a single reader, I recorded my thoughts as these days ticked by.

You can read what I had to say here and here and here. (I might have gotten the last two out of order. Ooops!)

I decided to repost links from last year simply because they fill in some details that you might not have hunted to find. : )

And to me they're beautiful. I know that sounds weird, but God's hand was so evident in Bub's last days and I knew last year I wanted to get some of that down 'on paper'.

Hugs and peace to you, my friends!