some Windows Love

I’m ‘hearting’ me a little bit of blog community tonight.  I love how when one is hurting, another comes along side for a hug and kind words.  Or when another had a crazy day or did something silly, someone is there to laugh along with us.  This journey has so greatly enriched my life.

But I didn’t think anything could enrich the actual technical aspect of the blogging itself until today.  I read this post and many of my blogging dreams came true.  I’m learning how to do things I never thought possible with my pics and I’m looking forward to the freedom this platform gives me.  And I can do a strike out without even going into html. {cue celestial singing}  And I’m figuring out a bunch of other stuff too! : )

I heart blogging.. and all of you.. and my new ‘love’…Windows Live Writer… which by the way, every time I type Live, it accidentally comes out Love.

Coincidence?  I think not! : )

my bathroom 'helper'

Hello... you're in my space.

Um.. yeah, it would be nice if you moved over just a tad.

You could sit in front of the other sink and I could use this one.

or not.

(don't look at my cluttered, outdated dusty vanity, k?)

getting it out of the way

I knew this morning that there were things I needed to get done. Things I've been putting off. I had a Chickfila coupon so I went 'out' to breakfast. It was free. : ) And then I came to stare at the calendar and noticed that sticky note I've already moved from 'August' to 'September'.

Take pages of Daddy's book to be redone after school starts.

Well school has started. But I haven't gone to the funeral home. So today I took the pages that were misprinted and got new ones on order. (they give a guest book thing that has his name and dates and funeral service info etc printed in it) And then I asked for a map to find my parents grave sites. I've been there before but knew I didn't have a clue exactly how to find them. So a nice lady came and brought me a map and offered to drive me out there. I told her no thanks and headed out. I found the general area, parked the car and started walking. She showed me how to look for a marker with the name of Sprinkle near the street and then start heading toward a tree and it should be 'right there'. Well, I did everything, but I still couldn't find it. A kind gardener noticed the lost look to my body language and the map I held in my hand and got me pointed in the right direction. Finally found it. Them. The year marker has been screwed into place. So I can check that off my mental list.

I decided since I was already doing fun stuff, I really should change Bub's flowers. They've been there a year and are starting to look kinda sad. So I went to a big chain store and the flowers were too expensive and I couldn't find exactly what I wanted. So I went to another chain store and found something more wonderful for half the price of the other store. AAAAAND.... they had these little butterfly pick things to go in the arrangements... in green no less. So I bought that and some pretty yellow roses. I carefully twisted the wire of the butterfly around the stem of the flowers so it doesn't blow away.

It turned out really pretty. I like the butterfly. He would have too. : )

open house

Last night was open house for Miss Boo's first year in high school. She goes to a 'small' private school. I say small in that compared to public school, it's very tiny. But compared to a lot of the privates in the area, it's HUGE. And to her, it's HUGE because she used to go to a much smaller private school and there were 40 in the entire middle school. Now, there are around 400 high schoolers. A big difference to her. She carries on about how many halls there are and how big the building is, but it's tiny compared to the public schools the hubs and I went to. So we just smile and nod when she carries on.

We got to meet all her teachers and see her classrooms. We hit each one on a seven minute class time with a five minute passing period. She only has two women this year... the rest of her teachers are men. Isn't that somethin'? She is taking sign language (ASL) for her foreign language. She seems really sweet. We also met her English teacher... the other female. Lots of reading this year. oh boy.

And now for the rundown of the men... her Algebra 1 teacher is an interesting character... former attorney... gives out candy for correct answers. LOL We met her Bible teacher. He is young and energetic and sees teaching Bible as his ministry and wants to get to know each one of his kids and really work to nurture them spiritually. How cool is that? : ) There is a new science and technology building and her Biology class meets in there. Really nice building. Nice older gentleman teaches it. She's taking Technology Application Survey...meaning a little bit of everything to get her feet wet in technology... from circuits, to programming to robotics. I think she will love it. We've already done some of the things they will learn there, here at home, just for fun. (circuits, robotics)

She's also taking Ancient World History. Another man teacher. He gave the rundown of the usual things like late work policy etc and asked if there were any questions. This one lady pretty quickly asked the funniest thing! "I know I've taken a lot of classes and this has got to be just about the boringest class there can be... ancient world history.... what are you doing to make it fun and interesting?" Cue the crickets there for a second or two! But he recovered quickly and told how he keeps things interesting by doing little projects in class and having groups and different things like that... just to keep the kids hopping and not sitting there staring at him or a book. Good answer. But what a funny question!

It's always nice to put a face to a name and feel like we understand what's going on a little bit better. Hoping it's going to be a great year. : )

but not

Yesterday's sermon was very interesting. He is starting a series about having an unbreakable faith. I had never thought about it that way before. But God does want to equip us to be unbreakable even when the world and life and the griefs and tragedies of this life come crushing down on us.

One of the things he brought up was the loss of children. And he speaks from first hand knowledge as they've experienced this unique loss. God has worked to heal their hearts and now they can turn and minister to others faced with the same circumstances. He used 2 Corinthians 4 and the two words that stood out to me were but not. All these things are going on but we are not crushed, but not driven to despair, but never abandoned by God, but not destroyed. But not.

I loved those words because they say so much. Yes life is hard. God never promises otherwise. Life can feel like it's caving in or like it will never be the same or we will never be happy again or whatever.. but not. We are never abandoned... never destroyed.

I remember at Bub's memorial, people kept telling me how strong I was. (and I'm not saying this to brag because...) I didn't feel strong. I knew I wasn't strong. God was the only thing keeping me together, pushing me forward and giving me peace and strength. I was grieving and feeling like life as I knew it was over but not. But not destroyed. But not without hope for Bub... for us. But not.

"Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies." vs 10 So that even though our hearts and bodies are weak and unable... Jesus may be seen as He works in our lives. He is the only thing that keeps me going.... the only reason my heart is healing/healed. I know there have been times of thinking unhealthily in regards to Bub's death and it's at those times I realize this is not God's work in my life... but me letting go of Him and trying to run things myself. During those times I AM crushed, in despair, feeling abandoned etc. But He did not abandon. In those times, I am the one that abandoned. I'm so thankful He brings me to see myself and see my need and run back to Him.

At those times, I can realize that even though I still might have difficult moments in regards to Bub and mental images that pop up at the worst times... but not. I'm so thankful for but not.

"We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves." vs 7

it's my birthday

I got a little bloggy makeover today for my birthday!

So happy birthday to me!

I was getting a little bit tired of the other one and found something cute... and free. The best price ever!

So I hope you like it. If you see anything I need to change, let me know.

Happy weekend, all! Hugs! : )

queso and peppers

Yesterday was a good day. But you won't believe what happened.

My friend wanted to eat at Chili's. I laughed when she told me that, because that was Bub's favorite place to eat. I told her about when we had five day a week chemo all day long, the nurses would come around and take orders from the kids for what they wanted to eat and they'd order it from the hospital. They didn't order anything for the starving parents by the way... I can't count how many days I didn't eat 'lunch' until 3pm! Anyway... they came to Bub and asked him what he wanted to eat and guess what he said!!!

Chips and queso! LOL

I found it sort of ironic that we ended up there on his birthday. But it gets more ironic as we're seated. The waiter explained the Create a Pepper campaign for St. Judes and asked us if we wanted to color a pepper. I thought that started in September. Freaky!

So I sat there sort of stunned for a second and then told him I'd draw a pepper. He brought one for my friend too. So we both colored peppers. I felt weird doing this with my friend... when this is usually something I do with my hubby every year. In a strange way, it felt very personal doing it with someone else. It wasn't my best work, shall we say.

I almost told him no, but then I knew he would try to sell me on it and since I didn't want to go into it with him, I went on ahead and said yes. He scanned my paper... that included a note in memory of him and said that it was his birthday and I drew balloons and stuff like that... and I think the color drained out of his face a little bit. Sometimes they say something when they see it, but this guy didn't say a word. (don't think he was very socially minded anyway just from the small amount of relating we did with him over our order)

Ya know.. in the end, I was just thinking whatever... let me draw it and move on. My friend moved them aside when we finished and we went on with our lunch. Of course, we had a huge list of things we'd been meaning to talk about... I know that's a shocker... two girls... and we gabbed away and had a nice lunch and a nice day.