follow up or p.s. or something

As a follow up to my last post, I thought I would let y'all in on what's happened since....in the bra department. So..I got 'fitted' for a new ("leisure") bra at the bra store. I also asked them to tell me the name of the SECOND bra I ever ordered from them, which is beige. It is also the third bra I ordered from them because I ordered another one when I saw how well it fit. This is the same bra that I could never get a clear answer from in the past about whether it was discontinued or they just wouldn't or couldn't get it anymore. Well, the girl gave me the name and code etc of the bra. I come home and pull my first white bra out of the closet to check the tag. THIS is the bra she gave me the info on. I have to say I was pretty furious. It just made. me.  mad. I felt like I was back at square one. I didn't call the store because frankly I just didn't want to talk to them.

I had been lamenting all of this to my friend Amy (at Wade's World...I would add a link but I got a new computer..an Apple..and I don't know how to do that yet..duh) and she suggested looking on Amazon. So I had been browsing and found a few that I had tried on in the store and a few that looked like they might be possibilities etc. But my eye kept coming back to this one certain one. So much so that I jumped out of bed..yes I shop for bras with my ipod in bed...and grabbed one of my favorite old beige bras so I could compare. The more I compared the more excited I got. And then I went and grabbed a magnifying glass. Cuz I'm an old lady. ; ) And could barely make out the faded style number on the tag...and it matched the one on Amazon. I was elated!

I ordered three the very next morning. They are exactly the same as the ones I loved from the bra store and they fit perfectly. And under any shirt, thankyouverymuch.

This whole thing has left an even worse taste in my mouth for the bra store. Because I have asked specifically about this bra at several fittings and have felt like I was getting the run around about it. I've been in sales, so I understand that if you can't get something, you try to steer your client toward something you CAN get. But at the same time, when we've tried on bra after bra and I've left the store empty handed and upset...or wearing something they know is ill fitting...you'd think they would care more about making somebody happy and creating a positive experience for the client, rather than just the bottom line.

 But I did order a leisure bra, as they call it, and it arrived. I got them the day before the good bras came in the mail from Amazon.  But frankly it's not all that comfortable. It creeps up which drives me out of my mind. Short trip. Those will do for back up and just to give my chest a rest but they are by far, not the most comfortable just because it moves around a bit and there is more fabric, which is frankly HOT in the summer. And since it's cotton, it kind of sticks to my clothes and makes me have to adjust my clothes a lot. bleh.

So where does this leave me? Well, I have three new bras that fit and look great...no thanks to the bra store. I thought about complaining to them, but opted not to say anything. I will continue to use the bra store from time to time and I really need a working relationship with them.

So as the popular song says, I just...let it go. : )

a crabby patty kinda day

I don't even know where to start. I guess I could first say 'hi'. And I've missed you all. I miss blogging but at the same time, I draw a blank often times when I sit down to write. Or I think of plenty to write while on the walking track at the gym but have little time to devote to my topic of the day. 

Anyway, here I am. And I think it's good to say "I'm fine". Really I am. 

But some days just kick me in the teeth and make me wonder why I didn't cry 'uncle' long before now. 

There's a lot going on...my hormones are all out of whack, which is to be expected. But they got a little more whacked out. And I really (really!) need some estrogen but I'm afraid to take some. Two doctors have proposed what they say is a safe way for me to get a little boost, but they don't agree on what is best. So I am stranded somewhere in the middle. 

I've about decided to take door number three. Which is do nothing, (which was a viable option when I talked to the nurse practitioner at my gyn's office) and wait for my body to sort of repair itself and bounce back. All the while feeling like I have a yeast infection. 

You're welcome for the fun times imagery there. : ) 

So there is that. It's been an ongoing thing for about three months now, healing what *was* a yeast infection and now just being really messed up. Down there. Wink wink. So it's come down to this...and which door to walk through. And all of them except do nothing carry some risk. But offer the most immediate healing. Ugh. Not an enviable position to be in. 

And then I went bra shopping today. Not fun. They stopped carrying the brand that kinda fits me. I tried on a hand full of bras...all the ones the shop carried...and none of them fit. I ended up buying (well my insurance did) what they call a leisure bra. Nice for Sunday afternoons or stay at home days. Looks way better under my clothes than some of the regular support bras she tried to sell me on.

I always wear a really simple top when I go try on, so I can slip my top back on and get an idea of what the bra looks like with clothes. I was shocked at how horrible they all looked. Very lumpy and bizarre. When I commented on how bad it looked under my clothes, she said "well if you're going to wear a shirt like THAT'. ??? My wardrobe is already drastically reduced because of all of this...I just couldn't stand to be told that I couldn't even wear a basic top. 

Adulthood? None of this was in the brochure. 

We are having salmon croquettes for dinner. Or as we like to call them, crabby patties. Today it's appropriate. ; )  Thanks for listening to me fuss and complain chronicle my 'journey'...some days it feels like smooth sailing and other days I feel like I've been pushed off a cliff. But I guess it's all a part of the trip.

Hugs and love, my friends. : ) 

12 years

Twelve years ago tonight, we kissed our little guy goodnight for the last time. He woke up in the arms of Jesus early in the morning.

It still hurts. A part of my heart still swells with ache when I recall those last days and the days following. And yet now as the years have gone by, it seems more settled. Less of a piercing and more of just an ache.

But still an ache.

The hurt is less extreme. There was less dread this year. I know part of the reason for that is that I now live in the shadow of not just what this awful disease has done to another person, but what it can do to me. And I to live every day with the realization that none of us are guaranteed a tomorrow.

And yet if we are His, we are guaranteed more than a tomorrow…we know He’s made a way for our eternity. So thankful for that.

Hugs and love to you, sweet one. We do still miss you and wonder all the what if’s. But we are thankful there is one thing we don’t have to wonder about. Your forever.

Love, Mommy

happy stuff

I went to the gym today in SHORTS and did not freeze. I may have blinded a few people temporarily with all the bright shining light from my snow-white legs. But other than that, it was good to be out and about wearing something lightweight and comfy. I know winter isn’t over yet and will surely show it’s ugly cold head, but I take what I can get when I can get it.

I took my kitty back to the vet today to get her kidneys checked out. Again. This was just a recheck to make sure everything was still grooving along the way it’s supposed to. She did a quick test and we waited for the results. And then she called her a miracle kitty again. Her labs are looking better than ever. And she’s gained 3 ounces. So it’s all good in the kitty hood right now.

I made baked flautas and what started out to be a mango salsa but was more of a veggie and fruit Mexican salad after I added everything but the kitchen sink. The girl and I both loved it. All the bites were eaten.

I’m still loving my NutriBullet. Love-ing! I am finishing a green smoothie while I write this.

See, happy stuff. I like that.

snow day

It’s snowing. I think a list is in order today.

1. Hubs had a wreck a few miles from home on the way to work this morning. (he’s fine!)

2. He called to tell me.

3. Calls not long after he leaves the house are NEVER a good sign.

4. But the fact that I was talking to him was a start in knowing that at least HE was ok.

5. It was only a fender bender. But he’s been on the phone all morning getting things in order to get it fixed.

6. He ended up driving the girl to school…and will pick her up when it’s over later this morning.

7. I was supposed to go to the grocery store this morning…but we can make it. I’ve got enough fresh stuff to get us by.

8. I am making a vegan broccoli ‘cheese’ soup for lunch. (for the girl and I..he will likely have a PB&J)  I made it for myself the other day to test out the recipe and it was soo good. Surprisingly. Pinterest is a wonder, that’s all I can say.

9. I’m not a winter girl. I’m ready to start shopping for real estate in Florida for my ‘winter home’. And I guess I can shop for my summer home in Colorado while I’m at it. ; )

10. When I woke up this morning, I checked WeatherBug on my iPod and it said our ‘feels like’ temp was –1. All I could think of was..what the hey??? This is Texas. It’s not supposed to get ‘minus’ anything here.

Dear Winter…I’m done.

Bush 43

So after being a Debbie Downer in my last post, I thought I would update again and tell you about the great day we had the day after Christmas. We loaded up the car and headed to Dallas to George W. Bush’s Library and Museum.

And it did not disappoint.

I had the idea to make this post because it was such a fun day but when I looked through my pics, I realized I didn’t take very many. I don’t know what was wrong with me. It was a teensy bit crowded and sometimes that makes it hard to take pics of just what you want..without lots of other people ‘ruining’ the pic. I really regret not taking pics of a single one of Laura’s beautiful gowns. Trust me..stunning! She is such a classy lady though, she could wear a feed sack and make it look like couture.

One of the big reasons I wanted to go at Christmas was because of the special displays during the holiday. This is the tree filled with ornaments that hung in the White House… I’m thinking 2002. The year the theme was ‘home for the holidays’. The tree was beautiful.

A little snippet up close.

 

Mt Vernon. I took at pic of that one because we’ve visited that one, so it felt a bit more familiar than the other homes. They were all beautiful.

I especially loved this quote. Sadly the America that so many people have fought and died for seems to be slipping away. This line of thinking is unheard of in today’s White House. (stepping down from soap box now)

There is a walk through replica of the oval office. It was packed with people (walking around the edges of the room is allowed) so it was impossible to get a good pic. So this is all I got…

See what I mean.

They had a photographer taking pics of people sitting at the desk. My girl and her boyfriend got pics together there. So I’ve got that. : )

The ceiling.

We had a great day. It was beautiful out that day and we enjoyed our visit. Highly recommend it if you visit Big D. : )

And now for something completely different. This is the girl opening her Christmas presents. Christmas before last I made ‘hot dog’ pillowcases for several of her friends, but just made one for her from scraps I already had in my sewing box. It was cute but it wasn’t something I picked just for her. And I kinda felt like I owed her one since I did it for everybody she knows. So I found some cute and happy kitty fabric and made this for her. Since she’s a teen and sleeps like…A LOT…I was able to make this right under her nose without her being aware of it. : ) It was a fun surprise for her.

Have a great day, y’all. : )

in my rear view mirror

So thankful to be on the back side of the holidays. I am always glad when the tree and all the decorations are put away and with it, all the sadness and unfulfilled expectations of ‘the perfect holiday’ can go too.

I lost my mom a few months before Christmas, a few weeks after we found out Bub wasn’t going to make it. That was a somber holiday. We tried to be festive. We tried to keep things exactly the same. We picked out ornaments with each kid just like always. But we had Bub pose with his, because we knew it would go into the attic and the next time we pulled it out, he would be gone. It was hard to muddle through and not behave like all these things were going on. But we tried our best and I think we did ok.

We lost him in April, as most of you know.

So along with the thankfulness that Christmas with all it’s mixed emotions is behind, comes the little ache in my heart, knowing that spring is just around the corner. I love spring. And yet it’s when we lost our little fella. Everything is a mix these days. Joy to the world along with knowing my mom (and now dad too) and my little Bub are with Him for the holiday and every day.

A while back I had an epiphany. When I was growing up, Christmas was perfect and wonderful and my favorite time of the year. Because my parents made it so, while they missed long since gone family they remember from long ago. I don’t know why that realization was comforting (but sad) to me, but it was. It sort of clicked with me that they experienced the same things…love and loss and feeling like it’s not quite right. It’s not new. It’s been going on for generations.

And so it goes…