A friend of mine called me earlier this week to see if I would need distractions today. For a split second, I wasn't quite sure what she was talking about.
And then it hit me. She's talking about April. 5th.
THE day.
The day we lost our sweet boy.
And then I had a pang of guilt. Because even though I always know the date and time, my (radar) attention is focused elsewhere right now. Yes, I had thought of it and then quickly shoved it aside. I struggle with how to handle grief so it doesn't just take over my day...and my body (and mind and spirit). Because even though remembering him is a normal thing, going "down the tube" for a day...or several days...is not good. Or physically healthy for me right now.
Because I'm focused on winning my own battle and everything it takes to do so.
But my sweet one is still with me. Every blood draw, every stitch I nursed, every pill I pop, every shot I give myself (and I did that last night) reminds me of how he fought....and lost...and gained his heavenly home.
So happy anniversary in heaven, sweet boy. You are NOT forgotten. Ever.
4 comments:
You shouldn't feel guilty about being distracted...you have a BIG distraction right now. AND you have a sweet friend..... :)
Shots?
I didn't know about you giving yourself shots Kay.
You've been through so much, all with that angel by your side.
Personally, I am glad to see this post this morning. I just saw the news about the horrid weather in your area, and I was ready to send you an SOS email.
xoxo
Happy Heavenly anniversary to your Bub and hugs for you and your family, Kay.
Sending loving, tender {{{HUGS}}} to you, especially on this day. Yes, you have plenty on your mind - it is no disrespect to your Bub that the date was "fuzzy" in your mind this year. He is always with you, in your heart. God bless you and your entire family!
Much love to you sweet friend! You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Post a Comment